Splice Archive
Email/Username
New User?
Pass (
Forgot?
)
Log In
About Splice
Follow Splice
Departments
Music
2024 Country Top Ten
Pop Culture
Racking: the “Best Hobby on Earth”
Sports
The Cost of Size
Moving Pictures
Lost in the Realm of Reality
Politics & Media
Dare to Dream of a New Postal Service
Writing
The Coffin Maker
Consume
Why I Don’t Rate Pizza Pie
On Campus
Talking Out of School
Sex
The Hierarchy of Unavailable Men
Digital
The Work of Unicorn Overlord
Baltimore
Baltimore Seen From Across the Ocean
Mixtape
Remembering The Ass
The Feed Archive
Don We Now Our Gay Flannel Apparel
at 12/20/2024 06:29am
The Enemy Within the Mirror
at 10/25/2024 06:28am
Real Men Aren’t Afraid of Powerful Women
at 10/04/2024 06:28am
Losing My (Catholic) Religion
at 09/13/2024 06:26am
Beetlejuice Beetlejuice
Rises From the Recently Deceased
at 09/06/2024 06:28am
Wasted Votes
at 08/23/2024 06:27am
TradWife: Nice Work For Some
at 08/16/2024 06:28am
Accidental Knowledge
at 07/26/2024 06:28am
Mushroom Zombies Are Gay
at 06/14/2024 06:28am
Jackass Disneyworld
at 05/31/2024 06:29am
Got Nothing
at 04/19/2024 06:28am
Grains of Sand
at 02/16/2024 06:28am
When Did You Know?
at 01/05/2024 06:29am
New Year’s Resolutions Are for Chumps
at 12/29/2023 06:31am
I Just Wanna Wiggle, Mama
at 07/15/2022 06:26am
The Cult of Victimhood
at 11/11/2020 06:28am
A Note From Karen
at 12/31/2019 06:28am
Wet Bar and Dry Floors
at 11/21/2019 06:27am
Breaking Up With Your Phone
at 08/27/2019 06:29am
Mall Rats
at 07/11/2019 06:28am
Generational TV
at 05/29/2019 06:28am
I'm 50 Today
at 05/21/2019 06:29am
Keeping Score Outside the Dugout
at 04/26/2019 06:28am
Choosing Nightmares
at 02/07/2019 06:28am
Mothers in Different Universes
at 01/28/2019 06:28am
Exhale the Bullshit
at 01/14/2019 06:28am
More Than a Piano Man
at 12/20/2018 06:27am
17 Resolutions for 2017
at 12/27/2016 09:11am
You Can’t Hurt Me
at 06/23/2016 06:50am
My Vagina Was Bored at the Male Stripper Movie
at 07/21/2015 07:20am
Falling Bridges
at 05/28/2015 06:41am
21 Lessons in Motherhood
at 04/23/2015 06:17am
The Endless Quest for Decent TV
at 04/16/2015 07:07am
The Demise of Little League
at 04/09/2015 06:22am
Hail the Mockumentary
at 03/25/2015 06:35am
You Can't Ground Your Kid For Being Gay
at 03/19/2015 07:11am
The Elusive Nature of Writing Inspiration
at 03/12/2015 07:33am
The Earth Takes Its Stuff Back
at 02/25/2015 06:12am
The Literary Douchebag
at 02/19/2015 06:58am
Too Stiff in One Way and Not the Other
at 02/13/2015 07:53am
Keep Your Unimmunized Kids Out of My Kid’s Public School
at 02/04/2015 07:23am
Flying People
at 01/28/2015 06:21am
Breaking Up With The Little Black Dress
at 01/14/2015 05:33am
King of Prussia Is Upside Down
at 01/08/2015 06:00am
Facebook Screws Up
at 12/31/2014 06:40am
Eat the Pie
at 12/17/2014 07:07am
The Saddest Christmas Song
at 12/10/2014 07:04am
Revisiting Bedford Falls
at 12/04/2014 07:11am
Finding Gratitude
at 11/26/2014 07:08am
Grief Is Exhausting
at 11/19/2014 06:10am
Stealing Away
at 10/31/2014 06:52am
Reading While Pooping
at 10/21/2014 08:32am
Buying Twitter Followers is Idiotic
at 10/16/2014 06:58am
Why I Don’t Work in Customer Service
at 10/09/2014 07:04am
Novel Writing: The Halfway Mark
at 10/01/2014 07:01am
Die, Beauty Pageants
at 09/25/2014 07:53am
Save the Cormorants
at 09/18/2014 09:30am
Sports Parent Failure
at 09/04/2014 07:04am
Yes, Feminism Is Sexy
at 08/26/2014 06:24am
Island Problems
at 07/23/2014 06:43am
Emoji Problems
at 07/09/2014 06:30am
The Scarlet Letter Society: Chapter One
at 07/08/2014 07:43am
I’m Voting for This Guy
at 06/17/2014 11:49am
Vive Candy
at 06/05/2014 07:13am
Eight Notes On
Maleficent
at 06/02/2014 06:49am
Is There Anything Wrong With Parental Bribery?
at 05/29/2014 06:43am
Breaking Up With My Horoscope
at 05/21/2014 07:22am
No, Bitch, I'm Not Pregnant
at 05/14/2014 06:44am
Jeans Are the Root of All Fashion Evil
at 04/30/2014 06:14am
Letting Go of "Let It Go"
at 04/08/2014 03:24pm
A Lethal
Scandal
Drinking Game
at 04/02/2014 07:37am
Obama and Comedy Between Two Ferns
at 03/13/2014 08:19am
Jumping the Fence
at 02/25/2014 06:39am
The Latest Reason to Hate Facebook
at 02/18/2014 06:32am
Be Your Own Valentine
at 02/14/2014 06:27am
I Love Tom Hanks and He Got Robbed
at 02/05/2014 07:10am
Dear Asshole Neighbor
at 01/31/2014 07:11am
From
High School Musical
to Keeping Her Baby
at 01/29/2014 06:11am
You, Sir, Are No Writer
at 01/17/2014 07:32am
The Jennifer Lawrence Burden
at 01/08/2014 07:04am
A Review of Amy Adams’ Tits
at 12/31/2013 07:18am
Don’t Let Your Daughters Grow Up to Be Fox News Anchors
at 12/16/2013 10:21am
Dear Santa Baby
at 12/13/2013 07:15am
Yes, Goddammit, There is a Santa Claus
at 12/06/2013 07:21am
Is Cursive Handwriting Dead?
at 12/03/2013 07:44am
Black Friday Blackens My Mood
at 11/29/2013 06:58am
How to Survive a Dysfunctional Family Thanksgiving
at 11/26/2013 07:07am
15 Seconds to Decide If Your Life is Worthwhile
at 11/20/2013 07:48am
You Might Be a 90s Mom
at 11/19/2013 07:11am
The Biggest Character on Tilghman Island
at 11/13/2013 07:30am
What Kind of Crazy Are You?
at 11/12/2013 05:50am
Birding Is Not a Whimsical Hobby
at 11/06/2013 08:40am
A Single Meal
at 11/05/2013 07:37am
Monsters in the News
at 10/30/2013 11:50am
Trick or Treating Etiquette Tips
at 10/29/2013 08:14am
Conspiracy Theories About Fainting Pregnant Women
at 10/22/2013 10:55am
Funniest Tweets About Facebook Shutdown
at 10/21/2013 10:35am
The Endangered Watermen
at 10/21/2013 07:59am
Five News Stories That Will Make You Believe in Zombies
at 10/16/2013 07:28am
Every Single Episode of
Wife Swap
at 10/15/2013 07:29am
Kids Are Dying From Cyberbullying
at 10/10/2013 07:10am
Baltimore Museums Aren't Boring
at 10/08/2013 08:04am
The Humor in a Government Shutdown
at 10/02/2013 07:46am
Sangria Conversations: What’s a Gunt?
at 10/01/2013 08:37am
It’s Time to Blame the NRA
at 09/30/2013 07:29am
12 Ridiculous BuzzFeed Headlines
at 09/26/2013 08:30am
Top Eight Things Wacky Conservative Blogs Have in Common
at 09/24/2013 08:00am
We All Hate Our Boobs
at 09/19/2013 07:06am
Stop Pissing Off Coffee Drinkers, Starbucks
at 09/18/2013 07:08am
Fox News Must Fire Todd Starnes
at 09/16/2013 09:13am
The 10 Sleaziest Tweets So Far This Month from The Fake McCain
at 09/11/2013 03:08pm
Lessons in Motherhood From a Spider
at 09/11/2013 08:28am
You Fail at Twitter
at 09/10/2013 06:28am
Here’s What Self-Involved Feminists Should Worry About
at 09/09/2013 02:33pm
Why Are You Calling Out Fat Lesbians?
at 09/06/2013 11:26am
Let the Boys Wear Pink
at 09/04/2013 07:20am
Mommyjuana
at 09/03/2013 08:59am
If You Linkbait Troll, You Are a Bad Person
at 08/30/2013 11:34am
The Story of the Red Plate
at 07/11/2013 07:40am
Camp Read-a-Book
at 06/21/2013 08:09am
Lois Lane Lover Smackdown
at 06/18/2013 07:06am
I Want To Kill a Placenta Tree
at 06/05/2013 11:42am
On Notre Dame Fandom
at 01/07/2013 05:44am
Bring It, Mexico
at 06/25/2010 06:53am
Jesus Christ: The Cartoon
at 05/27/2010 10:59am
Splice Original Archive
The Shot Heard Round the Girls
at 12/13/2024 06:27am
The Future of Cursive Writing is Cursed
at 12/06/2024 06:27am
Wicked
Queer
at 11/29/2024 06:37am
Nancy Mace and Transphobia
at 11/22/2024 06:27am
Touching Metaphorical and Literal Grass
at 11/15/2024 06:27am
Don’t Blame Me, I Voted For Harris
at 11/08/2024 06:24am
RBG’s Watching
at 11/01/2024 06:24am
Cue the Nickelback
at 10/18/2024 06:24am
Trolls Aren’t Worth the Energy
at 10/11/2024 06:24am
My Hearing Loss
at 09/27/2024 06:28am
It Never Rains
at 09/20/2024 06:24am
Let’s Talk About Malignant Narcissism
at 08/30/2024 06:26am
Teach Your Children Hell
at 08/09/2024 06:24am
Vagice Cream
at 08/02/2024 06:24am
Season Finale of the United States
at 07/19/2024 06:27am
Real Life Grey Gardens
at 07/12/2024 06:24am
Choosing Battles
at 07/05/2024 06:27am
Live Laugh Late Life Lesbians
at 06/28/2024 06:24am
Homophobia is Gay
at 06/21/2024 06:24am
Baseball is Gay
at 06/07/2024 06:27am
Abandonment is a Gift
at 05/24/2024 06:24am
Navigating Splitting in Borderline Personality Disorder
at 05/17/2024 06:24am
Tips on Navigating “Your BPD Person”
at 05/10/2024 06:24am
Glass Armor
at 05/03/2024 06:27am
Time’s Quicksand
at 04/26/2024 06:27am
The Terrorist Candlemaker
at 04/12/2024 06:27am
Racism and the Key Bridge Collapse
at 04/05/2024 06:27am
It’s Not Our Crucifixion
at 03/29/2024 06:29am
It’s Not Flattery
at 03/22/2024 06:24am
Don’t Give Condescending Advice to New Moms
at 03/15/2024 06:27am
Rewatching Ammonite: Still Hot!
at 03/08/2024 06:24am
My Allegedly Amish Boyfriend
at 03/01/2024 06:24am
Father Time is Undefeated
at 02/23/2024 06:24am
Obsessing over Dollhouse Miniatures
at 02/02/2024 06:27am
Sounds Like Something a Virgo Would Say
at 01/26/2024 06:24am
Cry Eagle Cry
at 01/19/2024 06:27am
Chicken Little
at 01/12/2024 06:26am
A Seasick Crocodile Christmas
at 12/22/2023 06:24am
Life as a Philadelphia Sports Fan
at 12/15/2023 06:24am
The Cult of Documentaries
at 12/08/2023 06:24am
Smudging the Decks
at 12/01/2023 06:24am
Gratitude is a Choice
at 11/24/2023 06:24am
I Saw Mommy Crushing Santa Claus
at 11/17/2023 06:28am
Dear Ex-Friend
at 11/10/2023 06:24am
Sea Glass as a Diminishing Resource
at 11/03/2023 06:24am
Funeral of a Dear Friend
at 10/27/2023 06:27am
Pain in the Aster
at 10/20/2023 06:24am
Anti-Paxxers
at 10/16/2023 06:24am
In the Event of My Untimely Death
at 10/06/2023 06:27am
The Pivot
at 09/29/2023 06:27am
Two Down, One to Go
at 09/22/2023 05:57am
She Cried More More More
at 09/15/2023 05:57am
He’s 18
at 09/08/2023 05:57am
Could You Survive on Alone?
at 09/01/2023 05:54am
Leatherface
at 08/25/2023 05:57am
The Economy of Childhood
at 08/18/2023 05:55am
Ghostly Winks
at 08/11/2023 05:55am
To the Man Walking the Dog
at 08/04/2023 05:57am
When Barbie Attacks the Kendom
at 07/28/2023 05:57am
Free 841
at 07/21/2023 05:57am
A Needle in the Haystack of Social Media
at 07/14/2023 05:55am
Toxic Productivity
at 07/07/2023 05:57am
Shades of Pride
at 06/30/2023 05:55am
Clouds in My Coffee
at 06/23/2023 05:55am
Pride in the Outfield and Beyond
at 06/16/2023 05:55am
The Mother Wound
at 06/09/2023 05:55am
One Dot at a Time
at 06/02/2023 05:55am
MerMania
at 05/26/2023 05:57am
Sentimental Hogwash
at 05/19/2023 05:55am
Today My Daughter is a Doctor
at 05/12/2023 05:57am
Marcel the Shell is Why All Moms Should Have Pot Gummies
at 05/05/2023 05:55am
Trilogy of Terror
at 04/28/2023 05:57am
Beer, Face Cream and Transphobia
at 04/21/2023 05:57am
Mommy Guilt is Optional
at 04/14/2023 05:57am
Dorothy Had the Shoes All Along
at 04/07/2023 05:57am
Rediscovering Freestyle Music
at 03/31/2023 05:57am
Ass Wednesdays
at 03/24/2023 05:55am
Pillow Talk
at 03/17/2023 05:57am
Self-Checkout Social Media
at 03/10/2023 05:57am
Comedy and Tragedy
at 03/03/2023 05:57am
The Leader of the Band
at 02/17/2023 05:55am
Grease the Poles
at 02/10/2023 05:57am
Quirky Netflix Documentaries To Watch
at 02/03/2023 05:57am
Welcome to My Fake National Park
at 01/27/2023 05:55am
He Makes The Sweaters
at 01/20/2023 05:55am
When Tide Pods Eat Themselves
at 01/13/2023 05:55am
How Inappropriate is the Mummers Parade?
at 01/06/2023 05:57am
The Rings I Didn’t Ask For
at 12/30/2022 05:57am
Chick Fillet
at 12/23/2022 05:55am
Ten Christmas Bops
at 12/16/2022 05:57am
This Can’t Be Real
at 12/09/2022 05:55am
The Worst $20 I Ever Earned
at 12/02/2022 05:55am
Checkmate
at 11/25/2022 05:57am
Energy Vampires Suck
at 11/18/2022 05:55am
Jehovah Doesn’t Hate The Gays, Becky
at 11/11/2022 05:57am
Haterade Mail
at 11/04/2022 05:55am
My Sister and the Elephant
at 10/28/2022 05:55am
The Karaoke Whisperer
at 10/21/2022 05:57am
Move Out
at 10/14/2022 05:55am
Dahmer
is Full of Bangers
at 10/07/2022 05:55am
On Toxic Positivity
at 09/30/2022 05:55am
Happy Birthday to My Hero
at 09/23/2022 05:57am
Learning to Say Goodbye
at 09/16/2022 05:55am
Alexa, Be My Bestie
at 09/09/2022 05:55am
I’m Not a Terrorist
at 09/02/2022 05:55am
Scattered Legos
at 08/26/2022 05:57am
Ten of TikTok’s Funniest Creators
at 08/22/2022 05:55am
Subtle Whoring
at 08/12/2022 05:55am
I Did Meet Yogi Berra
at 08/05/2022 05:55am
ASMR and Social Media
at 07/29/2022 05:55am
Hi, I’m Nobody
at 07/22/2022 05:57am
Getting Sick of Fake Sea Glass
at 07/08/2022 05:55am
Living with Borderline Personality Disorder
at 07/01/2022 05:55am
Who Bans Pride Flags During Pride Month?
at 06/21/2022 05:57am
Cue the Diana Ross
at 05/21/2022 05:57am
This Isn’t a Shop
at 04/19/2022 05:57am
Daddy’s Money
at 03/02/2022 05:57am
News Cycle Anxiety
at 10/23/2020 05:59am
You’re Not Alone
at 09/08/2020 05:57am
Moment of Accidental Normalcy
at 05/29/2020 05:57am
Parenting Quaranteenagers
at 04/30/2020 05:57am
Coronavirus Purgatory
at 04/20/2020 05:59am
Tiny Moments of Unraveling
at 12/12/2019 05:57am
You are Fucking Magnificent
at 11/12/2019 05:57am
Don’t Call a Bitch the B-Word
at 10/29/2019 05:55am
Capturing The Chesapeake
at 10/23/2019 05:55am
Creating Community Art
at 10/17/2019 05:57am
Sorry I Fucked Up Your Childhood
at 10/03/2019 05:57am
How to Suck Less at Surfing
at 09/25/2019 05:57am
Fuck Shopping Center Pedicures
at 07/25/2019 05:57am
Does Fake Sea Glass Matter?
at 07/02/2019 05:57am
Sharing Your Hunting Beach
at 06/05/2019 05:57am
The Unbelievable Wreck
at 02/19/2019 05:57am
No One Puts Buzz in a Box
at 02/11/2019 05:55am
Christmas Minimalism
at 12/14/2018 05:57am
Your Lost Shoe
at 11/01/2018 05:58am
Trash and Treasure
at 10/22/2018 05:56am
A Dam Mess
at 08/08/2018 05:58am
Twenty Things About Me
at 04/10/2017 05:55am
New Marble Book Focuses on Peltier Brand
at 04/03/2017 05:57am
When a Non-Dog Person Loses a Dog
at 03/27/2017 05:55am
Did Someone Say Mermaid Ball?
at 03/20/2017 07:00am
Beach Meditation
at 03/13/2017 02:06am
We Don’t All Agree Here
at 03/06/2017 05:55am
What’s in Your Lunch Box?
at 02/27/2017 05:57am
Popcorn to Sno-Cap Ratio
at 02/20/2017 05:55am
Costa Rica in Spirit Animals
at 02/13/2017 05:59am
Last Pediatrician Visit
at 02/06/2017 06:00am
I Can't Stay Silent Any Longer
at 01/30/2017 05:55am
There’s No Rescue From Stupid
at 01/23/2017 05:57am
Batman and the Queen
at 01/16/2017 05:55am
Is Seeded Glass Sea Glass?
at 01/09/2017 05:59am
Four Simple Life Rules
at 01/02/2017 05:56am
A Simple Christmas Family Tradition
at 12/19/2016 05:58am
Can You Forgive the Unforgiveable?
at 12/12/2016 05:58am
What’s on Netflix?
at 11/28/2016 05:58am
Subdivision Supervillain
at 11/21/2016 05:57am
Dead Horse Bay: Trash or Treasure?
at 11/14/2016 12:41pm
Battling Depression
at 11/07/2016 05:55am
I Talk to My Dead Sister
at 10/31/2016 07:19am
Chime Down, Canada
at 10/24/2016 06:57am
Your Chakras Are Fucked
at 10/17/2016 06:56am
The Last Pumpkin Patch Trip
at 10/10/2016 06:57am
Sea Glass Addiction
at 10/03/2016 06:57am
The Witch in the Maryland Woods
at 09/26/2016 06:58am
Sea Glass Treasures: Tough to Judge
at 09/19/2016 06:52am
College Marching Band Mom for Dummies
at 09/12/2016 06:59am
Beachcombing Family
at 09/05/2016 06:58am
Stop Buying Fake Sea Glass
at 08/29/2016 06:58am
Never All Out of Love
at 08/22/2016 06:57am
London in Fragments: A Mudlark’s Treasure
at 08/15/2016 06:57am
No Cupholders on Sailboats
at 08/08/2016 06:56am
Shitty Mom Syndrome
at 08/01/2016 06:57am
What Sea Glass Can Teach Us
at 07/25/2016 06:58am
Pokemon Stop and Go Traffic
at 07/18/2016 06:53am
The Importance of Girlfriends
at 07/11/2016 06:53am
Fireworks Are Mostly Overrated
at 07/04/2016 07:30am
Disney’s Gone Soft
at 06/27/2016 06:53am
Not Leaving Las Vegas
at 06/20/2016 06:48am
Learning to Give Zero Fucks in Life
at 06/13/2016 09:11am
A Simpler Childhood
at 06/06/2016 06:44am
The Days Are Long, the Years Are Short
at 05/31/2016 06:30am
Marching Band Is a Sport
at 05/23/2016 06:42am
Sea Glass
Breaking Bad
at 05/16/2016 06:32am
Little League in the Majors
at 05/09/2016 06:31am
Don’t Let a Stranger Wax Your Ladygarden
at 04/25/2016 05:01am
Chilly Hillary or the Warmer Bern?
at 04/18/2016 06:39am
Run Over By a Kayak
at 04/11/2016 05:42am
Shark Tooth Fossil Hunting
at 04/04/2016 06:47am
So You Need a Wedding Playlist?
at 03/28/2016 06:04am
Beware Fake Sea Glass
at 03/21/2016 06:50am
How to Write When You’re Not Writing
at 03/14/2016 06:43am
When I’m 50
at 03/07/2016 06:41am
Extreme Sea Glass Hunting at Davenport Beach, California
at 02/29/2016 07:24am
Good Porn Is Hard to Find
at 02/15/2016 07:07am
The Warning Shot
at 02/08/2016 06:49am
Baseball Season in the Snow
at 02/01/2016 06:50am
The Magic of Mudlarking
at 01/25/2016 07:03am
The Power of
Room
at 01/18/2016 06:37am
364 Days of Delightful Nothingness
at 01/11/2016 07:05am
Throw Out Your Crap, Americans
at 01/04/2016 06:48am
That Fruit Thing
at 12/21/2015 06:34am
No One Owns the Coastline
at 12/14/2015 06:11am
Pretending to Believe in Santa
at 12/07/2015 07:02am
When Maryland Screws Maryland
at 11/23/2015 07:32am
The Fetishization of Gaga
at 11/09/2015 07:06am
An Interview With Maryland’s Frank DeFilippo
at 11/02/2015 07:09am
Are YOU a Bestselling Author?
at 10/26/2015 07:00am
Frightland Family Fun
at 10/19/2015 06:56am
Think Like a Marble
at 10/12/2015 07:11am
Revved Up Like a Douche
at 10/05/2015 06:54am
Frog Slaughter
at 09/28/2015 07:12am
Beachcomber’s Nightmare
at 09/21/2015 06:59am
The Joy of Creating a Villain
at 09/14/2015 07:13am
The Little Piece of Sea Glass That Couldn’t
at 09/04/2015 06:19am
You Are Judged By Your School Supplies
at 08/31/2015 07:20am
His Maserati Does 185
at 08/24/2015 07:11am
Circular Objects
at 08/17/2015 06:20am
Five Cool Things About Getting Older
at 08/10/2015 07:06am
Great Blue Herons Don’t Do Selfies
at 08/03/2015 07:07am
Judging Other Women Makes Us Judge You
at 07/27/2015 07:20am
Watch Me Do the Humpty Hump
at 07/20/2015 07:04am
After the Fall
at 07/13/2015 05:17am
Happy Birthday to My Best Friend
at 07/06/2015 07:03am
The Lure of Sea Glass
at 06/29/2015 06:24am
The Real Mary McCarthy
at 06/22/2015 09:10am
How to Survive Amusement Park Chaperoning
at 06/15/2015 07:10am
Goodbye to All the Stuff
at 06/08/2015 06:36am
B4 and After
at 06/01/2015 06:35am
Diagnosis: Aging
at 05/25/2015 05:51am
World Series of Mom-Birding
at 05/18/2015 07:17am
Scenes from a Baltimore Book Festival
at 05/04/2015 06:55am
Vegan for a Day
at 04/27/2015 06:44am
You Can’t Read Mommy’s Book
at 04/20/2015 07:05am
Dream Job: International Beachcomber
at 04/13/2015 06:15am
Abortion is None of Your Business
at 04/06/2015 06:20am
When Presidential Candidates Ignore Science
at 04/01/2015 07:04am
Oops, I’m Fat Again
at 03/30/2015 07:18am
Bottomless Pain
at 03/23/2015 06:58am
Kayaking With Consequences
at 03/16/2015 06:17am
Battered Off the Diamond
at 03/09/2015 06:59am
A Wasted Friday On The Internet
at 03/02/2015 06:30am
My Worst Nightmare
at 02/23/2015 06:27am
What Teaching Can Teach You
at 02/17/2015 06:43am
The Joy of Doing Nothing
at 02/09/2015 06:23am
The Myth of Fort Bragg’s Sea Glass Beach
at 02/02/2015 06:42am
Embracing The Facebook Cleanse
at 01/29/2015 07:11am
Stop Tattle Texting
at 01/26/2015 07:00am
The Time I Failed at Meeting Warren Buffett
at 01/19/2015 06:48am
The Catholic Disciplinarian
at 01/12/2015 06:00am
Two Kinds of Hunters
at 01/05/2015 06:42am
I'm Sherlocked
at 12/29/2014 06:06am
The Girl in The Window
at 12/25/2014 07:17am
Someone Forgot to Move the Elf
at 12/22/2014 05:30am
Don’t Tell Me To Hang In There
at 12/15/2014 07:03am
45 Observations Of
Sesame Street
at 12/08/2014 06:47am
He Never Wants to Retire
at 12/01/2014 07:11am
Jesus Is Not an Asshole
at 11/24/2014 06:24am
Sea Glass Seeding Versus Tumbling
at 11/17/2014 06:46am
My Sister Did Not "Pass Away"
at 11/10/2014 06:36am
Brief Observations of Hillary Clinton
at 11/03/2014 06:36am
The First Pitch
at 10/27/2014 07:06am
I Don't Understand Nice People
at 10/20/2014 06:56am
Penises at The Movies
at 10/13/2014 07:09am
Bloody Mary
at 10/06/2014 06:40am
Mom at a Concert
at 09/29/2014 07:43am
As Parents, We Are
The Giving Tree
at 09/22/2014 07:08am
The Shame of Losing a House
at 09/15/2014 06:59am
Pick Me Out a Winner, Bobby
at 09/08/2014 07:07am
The Circle
is Real
at 09/01/2014 07:03am
Back to School Tears of Joy
at 08/25/2014 06:50am
Chill Out, Ice People
at 08/20/2014 07:04am
My Cryaking Journey
at 08/18/2014 06:53am
Parents Are Mortal
at 08/11/2014 06:48am
The
Airplane
Test
at 08/04/2014 06:39am
Breaking Up With Family Members
at 07/28/2014 07:03am
GM Should Recall My Car
at 07/21/2014 07:05am
The Chesapeake Bay is Doomed
at 07/14/2014 07:05am
Vacation Is Overrated
at 07/11/2014 07:07am
Beards and Wind Chimes Need to Go
at 07/07/2014 07:08am
Why You Shouldn’t Have Sex With a Jacuzzi
at 06/30/2014 07:39am
No Joy in Mudville
at 06/23/2014 06:44am
I Dream of Tiny Houses
at 06/16/2014 06:42am
Lady of the Flies
at 06/09/2014 06:49am
Dear Class of 2014
at 06/02/2014 06:49am
My Very Short Time as a Stripper
at 05/27/2014 06:49am
A Defense of the Exquisite Word "Thundercunt"
at 05/19/2014 06:45am
Is There Such a Thing as Objectifying Men?
at 05/12/2014 06:00am
Just Let Me Turn 50
at 05/05/2014 06:45am
Eleven Fictional Characters I Wanted To Be
at 04/28/2014 06:43am
Twentieth Anniversary of Motherhood
at 04/21/2014 07:03am
Dealing With Writer’s Terror
at 04/14/2014 07:00am
Microbeads Are Freaking Me Out
at 04/11/2014 07:02am
If You've Ever Been a Waitress
at 04/07/2014 07:00am
The Douchebag Coach Vs. the Douchebag Parent
at 04/04/2014 07:02am
Friendship Default
at 03/31/2014 06:33am
Ten Things You Can Learn From 24 Hours in New York
at 03/27/2014 07:22am
Nightmare Onstage
at 03/24/2014 07:07am
The Death of the Greasy Spoon
at 03/20/2014 06:13am
Losing Faith
at 03/17/2014 07:26am
Not Jaded by the Homeless
at 03/13/2014 06:48am
OMG a Totes Nightmare
at 03/10/2014 07:05am
11 Ways to Be a Better Blogger
at 03/06/2014 06:46am
Town Mouse to Country Mouse
at 03/03/2014 06:57am
Selling My First Novel
at 02/28/2014 07:01am
Trusting the Spanx Pee Hole
at 02/24/2014 07:00am
Psycho
Minus the Violins
at 02/21/2014 07:09am
When a Dog Attacks Your Kid
at 02/17/2014 06:52am
Longform vs. Listicle
at 02/13/2014 05:04am
Scared of Fat Shaming
at 02/10/2014 06:14am
Escaping a Haunted House
at 02/07/2014 05:51am
The Real Crazy Cat Lady
at 02/03/2014 06:22am
Not Keeping Score in Kids' Sports
at 01/27/2014 06:20am
Ativan is Not A Pizza Topping
at 01/22/2014 07:00am
Terrell Suggs Better Extend His Baltimore Ravens Contract
at 01/20/2014 07:14am
Breaking Up With A Dream House
at 01/16/2014 07:18am
Robot Handjobs Are a Thing
at 01/13/2014 06:39am
The Art of Facebook Blocking
at 01/09/2014 04:53am
The Parenting Tunnel
at 01/06/2014 07:16am
Big Daddy
at 01/03/2014 07:40am
Five Reasons Not to Make New Year’s Resolutions
at 12/30/2013 07:11am
The Innocence of the Rainbow Loom
at 12/23/2013 06:36am
The Last Christmas Pageant
at 12/19/2013 06:12am
Judging Splice Today’s Writing Contest
at 12/16/2013 07:20am
Which Christmas Misfit Are You?
at 12/12/2013 06:42am
Girl, 12
at 12/09/2013 07:02am
The Boat People
at 12/05/2013 05:31am
Funny Blogs, Funny Books
at 12/02/2013 07:23am
A Moment in Time
at 11/27/2013 07:08am
I Could Take You to Jail, Ma'am
at 11/25/2013 06:00am
The Chocolate Covered Cherry Club
at 11/21/2013 07:11am
My Stint as a Sex Toy Reviewer
at 11/18/2013 07:19am
My Short Time as a Fast Food Grunt
at 11/15/2013 07:14am
Hiring Veterans Just Makes Sense
at 11/11/2013 07:13am
Endangered Maryland
at 11/08/2013 06:54am
Born Without a Filter
at 11/04/2013 06:23am
Down With the Halloween Helicopter Parents
at 10/31/2013 07:07am
Castles in the Sand
at 10/28/2013 07:11am
No, I Wouldn’t Kill to Have Her Body
at 10/25/2013 07:11am
Talking to Your Teen About Sex
at 10/21/2013 07:34am
Meet My Ghost
at 10/17/2013 06:36am
Maids of Dishonor
at 10/14/2013 07:07am
Just Ask Him About the Music
at 10/11/2013 07:14am
Beachcombing: A Sense of Community
at 10/07/2013 07:04am
I Hate My Breast Tumor
at 10/04/2013 06:10am
The Worst Breakfast I Ever Loved
at 09/30/2013 07:06am
What Kayaking Will Teach You
at 09/27/2013 06:59am
God, Please Tell Me the Pope is Gay
at 09/23/2013 07:24am
Why Generation X is Missing
at 09/20/2013 07:07am
Thank a Teacher
at 09/16/2013 07:03am
The Politics of Hip-Hop Cardio
at 09/13/2013 07:11am
The Instaporn Overshare
at 09/09/2013 07:03am
Mean Girls Suck
at 09/06/2013 06:35am
Perusing StumbleUpon Interest Categories
at 09/02/2013 06:13am
The Advantages of Being Poor
at 08/29/2013 06:23am
Back to School Blahs
at 08/26/2013 06:33am
Sea Glass Hunting for Dummies
at 08/22/2013 07:20am
The Frightened Entertainer
at 08/19/2013 06:43am
Are You a Good or Bad Feminist?
at 08/15/2013 07:32am
My Job Would Be Perfect If I Hated My Boss
at 08/12/2013 06:24am
Dentist Offices: The Great Unifier
at 08/08/2013 07:57am
I Hate Dogs
at 08/05/2013 07:31am
Five Reasons Office Space is a Cult Classic
at 08/01/2013 06:41am
Teaching: It’s All About the Glasses
at 07/29/2013 07:18am
Bruce Willis is Smoking Hot in The Fifth Element
at 07/25/2013 06:51am
Breaking Up With Toxic People
at 07/18/2013 07:40am
Texas is an Embarrassment
at 07/15/2013 07:21am
Eight Ways to Avoid Screwing Up Instagram
at 07/08/2013 06:47am
Erotica Review: Sex Worm Apocalypse
at 07/05/2013 07:21am
Dear Cranky Commenter Troll
at 07/01/2013 05:54am
My Love-Hate Relationship With Diet Coke
at 06/28/2013 07:24am
Nice Beaver
at 06/24/2013 07:44am
My Interview With A Hipster
at 06/17/2013 07:08am
Candy Crush Cheats Equal Having No Life
at 06/13/2013 07:13am
You Can Probably See Me Naked
at 06/10/2013 07:18am
Are You Standing Up When You Pee?
at 06/03/2013 07:20am
Seven Reasons The Breakfast Club is the Best Movie of the 1980s
at 05/30/2013 07:32am
How to Get High Speed Internet in 2013
at 05/27/2013 06:56am
Memoirs of a Girl Scout Leader
at 05/23/2013 06:37am
It’s My Birthday, And Who Gives a Fuck?
at 05/20/2013 06:46am
Sometimes You Embarrass Your Kid Just By Existing
at 05/15/2013 07:26am
The Girl With No Fingerprints
at 05/13/2013 10:40am
The Spirits of Ireland
at 05/09/2013 02:32am
10 Ways to Fail at Traveling In Ireland
at 05/06/2013 03:34am
Luck O' the Irish? Or Just Jameson?
at 04/29/2013 05:12am
Keeping Score in Little League Baseball
at 04/25/2013 02:34am
Messing Up a Girl’s Lady Parts Isn’t Cool
at 04/22/2013 03:27am
The Passing of Orlando Ridout V is Maryland’s Loss
at 04/19/2013 03:40am
The Flopping Penis
at 04/15/2013 03:12am
10 Things I Hate About Facebook
at 04/08/2013 03:12am
Failure to Unplug
at 04/04/2013 03:43am
The Curmudgeonly Judge
at 04/01/2013 05:36am
Deleted: Pussy
at 03/25/2013 03:10am
The Victimless Hit and Run
at 03/18/2013 03:43am
I’m a Dry Drunk
at 03/14/2013 03:26am
The Not-So-Wonderful Wizard of Oz
at 03/11/2013 03:23am
The Tooth Fairy is a Fraud
at 03/07/2013 02:16am
I Learned About Sex From Salt-N-Pepa
at 03/04/2013 02:20am
Top Ten Reasons I Hate Mommybloggers
at 02/25/2013 02:22am
My Vagina Hates Spin Class
at 02/21/2013 03:06am
Playing With Guns
at 02/18/2013 01:56am
Gone Girl: A Chilling Roller Coaster Read
at 02/14/2013 02:14am
My Virtual Valentines
at 02/07/2013 02:03am
Accidental Sea Glass Suicide
at 02/01/2013 02:40am
The Terrifying Nature of Hope
at 01/28/2013 02:16am
Fuck This Cold Weather
at 01/24/2013 02:18am
How to Fail at Being Sexy
at 01/21/2013 02:22am
In Defense of Air Supply
at 01/14/2013 02:09am
My First Paid Writing Gig
at 01/10/2013 02:34am
The Titanic Exhibit Experience
at 01/07/2013 01:49am
Granny Panties
at 12/31/2012 02:52am
Just Go See Les Miserables
at 12/27/2012 02:53am
What's Your Favorite Christmas Song?
at 12/24/2012 01:36am
On Trespassing, Sea Glass and Madness
at 12/20/2012 01:56am
Gifts That Will Never Be Opened
at 12/17/2012 01:43am
Meeting Steinbeck
at 12/10/2012 02:16am
The Unintentional Martha Stewart Christmas
at 12/06/2012 02:03am
My Brief Career in Shoplifting
at 11/29/2012 12:52am
A Hometown Holiday Visit
at 11/26/2012 02:07am
10 Ways to Embrace Your Inner Grinch
at 11/19/2012 03:08am
Ding Dong, Is Lori Really Dead?
at 11/15/2012 02:00am
Housekeeping Zen
at 11/12/2012 02:29am
The Bay: A Toxic Mix of Frankenfish and Government
at 11/08/2012 02:20am
What Kind of Mom Are You?
at 11/05/2012 01:55am
Hurricane Preparedness: Why I Suck
at 10/28/2012 04:08pm
Politricks as Usual
at 10/25/2012 03:08am
The Liberation of the F Bomb
at 10/22/2012 03:24am
Lessons From Gal Sprout Camp
at 10/18/2012 03:33am
Frankenweenie is Delicious
at 10/15/2012 03:30am
There’s an Addictive App for That
at 10/08/2012 03:11am
Twitter Unfollow Etiquette
at 10/05/2012 03:12am
10 Things I Learned From the Current Issue of Cosmo
at 10/01/2012 02:23am
Here’s to You, Mr. Overly Enthusiastic Dick Pic Sender
at 09/26/2012 03:39am
Maryland: Eastern Shore vs. Western Shore
at 09/24/2012 03:02am
How To Lose 50 Pounds By Eating Brunch
at 09/20/2012 04:20am
Calls from the Ghetto
at 09/16/2012 11:10pm
Hope Springs is a So-So Girlfriend Movie
at 09/13/2012 03:47am
The Maryland Renaissance Festival is Actually Fun
at 09/10/2012 02:50am
5 Reasons I Suck at Writing a Novel
at 09/07/2012 03:33am
Finding The Lump in My Breast
at 09/03/2012 03:09am
My Life as a Mascot
at 08/30/2012 02:34am
I Am Waterwoman, Hear Me Roar
at 08/27/2012 02:18am
Five Kids’ Movies That Don’t Suck
at 08/23/2012 04:29am
We’re All Going to Die
at 08/20/2012 02:20am
Judge Not, Bitches
at 08/15/2012 04:14am
The Best Campaign of This Election Year
at 08/13/2012 02:57am
Keynote Smackdown: Martha Stewart vs. Katie Couric
at 08/08/2012 03:33am
How to Raise an Agnostic
at 08/06/2012 04:39am
Life is a Big Gay Cabaret
at 07/30/2012 02:41am
Long Live Stephen the King
at 07/26/2012 05:02am
Top of the Lungs Music Therapy
at 07/23/2012 02:57am
Maryland is for Steamed Crabs
at 07/16/2012 03:10am
Topper Moms are Bottom Feeders
at 07/12/2012 04:11am
Driven Crazy at the MVA
at 07/09/2012 03:47am
Magic Mike Movie Review by My Vagina
at 07/02/2012 02:30am
Nora Ephron’s Writing Inspiration for Women
at 06/27/2012 08:08am
The Glass Ceiling Myth
at 06/25/2012 02:07am
Rock of Ages is All About Moist Panties
at 06/21/2012 03:28am
10 Reasons I'm Too Old for Camping
at 06/18/2012 03:24am
No Slim Jims at the Gym
at 06/11/2012 02:42am
Unnecessary Graduations
at 06/04/2012 06:14am
Progress Is The Enemy of Masculinity
at 05/28/2012 02:43am
11 Things About 50 Shades
at 05/21/2012 06:45am
Queue This
at 10/06/2010 06:48am
A Very Vine Mess
at 09/22/2010 05:57am
Carnivwhore
at 09/14/2010 06:14am
Wipes? My ass!
at 09/01/2010 06:40am
Sizing Yourself Up
at 08/19/2010 07:07am
Edit My Profile: I'm DEAD
at 07/28/2010 06:42am
Bite Me
at 07/16/2010 06:56am
Don't Call Me Shirley
at 07/08/2010 05:13am
Saint Sarah Palin?
at 07/01/2010 06:36am
What’s the Problem With Whoring?
at 06/15/2010 06:51am
Collapsitarianism
at 06/08/2010 06:21am
No Google for Cougars
at 06/01/2010 11:14am
The Other Punch to the Gut
at 05/26/2010 05:54am
Textually Inconsistent
at 05/11/2010 06:01am
Happy Birthday, Birth Control
at 04/27/2010 06:35am
Wonder Womanatrix?
at 04/20/2010 07:06am
Multimedia Archive
Contact Us
Advertise with Splice
Jobs
FAQ
Privacy Policy
Terms & Conditions
© Splice Today LLC All Rights Reserved