Splicetoday

Politics & Media
May 27, 2008, 05:33AM

Condoleezza Rice Planning Out Post-Bush Career

After taking a break from teaching at Stanford to publicly moderate the extreme foreign policy views of Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld, Secretary of State Rice will return to the comforting arms of academia. Future classes include: Defending Pro-Torture Policy, How To Throw Away International Regard Like A Drunk Frat Boy's Bankroll In Vegas, and Applying A Varnish Of Progress On The Turd Of A War In Iraq (graduate students only).

"If Rice were to come back to the Farm immediately after her service as secretary of state, her return would closely follow the controversial appointment of former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld as a distinguished visiting fellow at the Hoover Institution. The appointment of the former Bush administration official sparked considerable uproar among many students, faculty and staff members who objected to some of the decisions he made during his tenure, particularly those related to the conduct of the Iraq War.

“Universities aught to be places in which all points of view are both represented and welcomed,” Rice said. “If universities are not open to views, no matter how controversial, I don’t know where the practices of the freedom of ideas will be carried out.”

During her remarks at Google’s headquarters, Rice defended the interrogation tactics against terrorist suspects approved by the Bush administration in the aftermath of the September 11 attacks. Although she refused to discuss internal deliberations within the administration, Rice acknowledged that “a lot has happened, and a lot has evolved in these years” since the attacks.

Rice said she does not anticipate a large public outcry against her return.

“We’ll see if people want me back,” Rice said. “I think so.”

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